First Week of Uni

Drained. Mentally.

Everything seemed too familiar. The empty promises from the faculty (small-sized class, fully equipped room, different and better facilities only-God-knows-what-those-are), the atmosphere, the people, the books... Nothing new. I feel like I'm stepping into a collection of my own memories from middle school plus the-not-so-great-world outside SMA Regina Pacis. I am not ready.

The classes are actually great. The lecturers are literally the best people that committed to the job. They are really insightful and I like how I could see the opportunity to grow and develop in this community. But this is not what I really want.

I always envisioned myself as a future banker. Dealing with the foreign exchange, doing trading and keeping myself updated with the current economic issues every single minute. I don't see myself representing the country as an ambassador or debating at some international organization meetings - fighting for issues that I care about.

I don't want to discourage anyone from applying to this university. It's just that what suit others not always the best for you. I have comparison. I have my own dream. I have my own ambition to be the First Lady. I have my own concept about living your life to the fullest.

and maybe the key fact is that I never care about popularity or ranking.

Yes, I might have kicked 33 people to get to where I am today but I never feel proud of the statistics. I had enough with the prestige, rank and popularity of being the best of the best in top schools. I might win the entrance exam battle, but I failed to convince myself.